The United States has a long and illustrious history as a humor producer. But in recent years, much has changed. And some humor economists predict that by the year 2025, the U.S. will be running an annual humor deficit of nearly 2 billion jokes per year.
The causes of this “humor gap” can be traced to the fact that the U.S. Government’s support of the humor industry has dropped off sharply since 2000. At one time the largest single producer of humor in the world, the government under President Obama halted virtually all humor production. Under previous President Bush, production of public sector humor had reached all time highs, but today, the public’s demands for laughs has fallen almost exclusively (with the exception of the Republican primaries) on private industry.
But their output is at its lowest point in 50 years, and as a result, the humor gap has become a reality for the American consumer. Humor stockpiles are at all-time lows, and speculators have driven the price of available humor to record levels.
What can be done? The most obvious course of action is for Americans to cut back on their use of humor. For too long we have squandered our humor resources, blatantly telling joke after joke, wasting puns, and foolishly using up limericks. A spokesperson for the U.S. Department of Humor states that if Americans don’t practice conservation, rationing may be a reality by the end of 2013.
For the sake of future generations, we must learn to get by on less humor. If we don’t, our children and grandchildren will be the ones who suffer. In a very real way, the joke will be on them.
Camels have three eyelids.